Guys..I think we should take a break..
The focus will once again be on Johnny Depp’s portrayal of the witty Jack Sparrow who after being devoured by the giant kraken in the last show, will be saved by his swashbuckling compatriots, not because they missed him, of course…
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Arrr…Waste of time…
Alas the show proved to be a major disappointment…Sure, the charming Depp is still around with his manly locks and quirky acts. Even then, the director Gore Verbinski seemed to exploit on this character just too much, with too much screen time used to just try and get a laugh out of him. As if one wasn’t enough, most of the scenes showed two, even a whole ship of Jack Sparrows! Was this really necessary? Suddenly, Jack’s usually pleasing tone starts to become irritating…
The amount of screen time used for jack was also probably the reason why no new INTERESTING characters were introduced this time round. Chow Yun Fatt, you said? All he brought to the show was probably some “Asian” presence, enhanced by the wordings “Welcome to Singapore” spoken by chow, shown everytime in the trailer, perhaps a marketing gimmick to attract more asian audiences to the show.
Like Chow, the other pirates kings, were also introduced to try and spice up the action. Well they sure did that… Creating a racket at a pirates meeting, giving up some poor old artifacts of their own, showing Asians can paint their whole face vividly white or speak in a high pitched voice and then?
Just showed up smiling and cheering near the end of the show, after leaving jack’s ship to fight davy jones and the East India company’s entire armada of ships alone… And there I was anticipating they would exhibit their own unique type of ships or even crewmembers with special skills or features to use in this climatic battle.. How wrong I was, what a woeful sight they proved to be…
Wait, there is one more “major” character i have missed out. How could anyone forget the great and highly feared sea goddess, Calypso turning in her true form…A giant human figure last seen from B grades movies like “Attack of the 50 foot Woman”.. Worst was to come for the audience when she evaporates into millions of small little harmless crabs that dive peacefully into the deep blue sea. Awwww…
Something got to be right
However ,the show was not ENTIRELY a flop, thanks to the return of Captain Barbosa and most importantly, his pet monkey, with the name of Jack but certainly more hilarious than Depp this time round. Barbosa’s acting made him look like a true pirate from head to toe, which made the show more “piratey” and you relate more to his character. Jack the monkey created more laughter from the audience than all the other characters in the entire show! That really summed up the show.
The final battle between Davy Jones’ ship, The Flying Dutchman and Jack’s Black Pearl in a swirling maelstrom also provided much needed entertainment.
But…the inclusion of the scene in between, where Will Turner (Orlando Bloom) proposes to Elizabeth Swann (Keira Knightley) was both a turnoff and unusual. Keira’s reaction of “I don’t think this is a good time” should have been heeded by the director. Orlando’s stone-less facial acting (as usual) does little to improve the scene.
One final frustrating weird moment arrives when the East India Company’s leading ship lead by the cold blooded Lord Beckett meets Jack’s Black Pearl and his companions with obviously more cannons and weaponry… Watch the show and you would feel as flabbergasted as I am..
What a dissssapointmenttt..
Final words
I do appreciate this is a Walt Disney film, whose main aim is always to amuse people. But the previous shows presented to us interesting new characters (Skeletons at night, Davy Jones) and they looked fresh and provided much needed entertainment and laughter (Jungle scene in Pirates 2).
The fact that some of the scenes in Pirates 3 were shot simultaneously during Pirates 2 showed through the lack of new ideas. The estimated budget of U$300 million certainly could have been used to create new CGI creatures like the kraken, instead of trying to think so hard to make us laugh with multiple versions of Jack Sparrow…
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